hector_rashbaum: Jon Walker gleefacing (jon)
[personal profile] hector_rashbaum
Answers from the 15 character meme. I meant to do this before I left for Hell weekend (I will probably tell the story later) but I didn't I HOPE THE SUSPENSE DIDN'T KILL YOU.

[livejournal.com profile] mayqueen517 asked:

Since I'm into all the kidfic right now, tell me about when Nicole Anderson and Zack Hall had a baby. Why'd they name Tom Conrad godparent and why is Brendon Urie so jealous?

OKAY so [personal profile] verbosewordsmith and I have this chafic 'verse (that I will probably be posting soonish) where Panic/Nicole/Zack/assorted bandom folks (and Mika, idk) teach at this awesome alternative elementary/middle school, and because I am me in that 'verse I am pushing hard for Nicole (who co-teaches second grade with Mika)/Zack (who teaches first grade and coaches soccer).

So in that universe, they have an adorable flirtation and then an adorable relationship filled with hardcore shows and wrangling bbs and Nicole going to every soccer game even late in the season when it's freezing and snow is a possibility and bringing hot cocoa/coffee in a thermos and prancing over from the stands during halftime to share with Zack. And then they get married and it's an adorable wedding and Nicole won't let Zack wear camo shorts to the ceremony but she approves them for the reception because she's the best girlfriend - best WIFE.

And then Nicole gets knocked up and she is THRILLED because a) she loves bbs and b) the due date is fairly late in June so she won't have to take any maternity leave yay. And she is the most adorable pregnant lady and Zack is permanently :D instead of permanently :| and it's great.

And Brendon is the OBVIOUS choice for godparent, he is Zack's bro and Nicole adores him and he's great with kids and he's in a nice stable relationship (with Spencer/Ryan/Jon) that they both agree would be a great environment for their little dude (they don't find out the sex but "Little Dude" is way better than calling the baby "The Baby"). But they can't just tell him, because what fun would that be, so when they announce godparent they pick the most random person they can think of - Jon's faily rock star friend they barely know outside a few interactions when he's home and hanging out with Jon.

They keep it up right until Little Dude is born because Brendon is trying to be supportive and pretend he's not achingly jealous and that is the best entertainment, and then they lol in his face and tell him of COURSE he's god-daddy, who would trust Tom Conrad with a baby.

Anyway they have a girl named Lily and she is the most hardcore badass little princess on Earth.

Spencer Smith, Ian Crawford, Dallon Weekes, and Darren Criss are at Hogwarts! What house do each of them go to? Why does Spencer Smith keep hooking up with Z Berg and why is Dallon Weekes so MAD? Ian Crawford holds the record for what? Also, why does Darren Criss keep getting lost?

lol I like how you were one number away from a straight-up nu!Panic Harry Potter AU. Darren is a good Brendon stand-in, at least.

I think they might all be Gryffindors? I always waffle on Spencer but from where I am in my HP reread I can kind of see who they would all line up with in the actual universe and they are all Gryffindors. BORING but idc.

The obvious answer is that Spencer keeps hooking up with Z because she is super hot and sarcastic and also happens to know a bunch of good hookup spots near the Ravenclaw tower so it's easy to sneak away for a quickie. Also, she is extremely hot and they have Charms with the Ravenclaws and Spencer can only handle so much watching her handle her wand before he snaps, okay.

Dallon is mad because he is 90% sure one of the Bludgers has a grudge against him and keeps ruining his Quidditch tryouts. He'd be a great Keeper, okay, but that Bludger clearly has it out for him >:(

Ian holds the dubious honor of eating the most Chocolate Frogs in a single sitting. The competition was fierce and he spent an hour in the hospital wing hating his life, but he was also personally congratulated by Dumbledore, so stick that in your wand and smoke it, everyone.

Ryan Luciani, Sean Van Vleet, Max Steger, and Jon Walker form a band. Tom Conrad is their manager. Who on the list is their biggest fan? Who hates them (and why!)? Also, tell me a story about them being on tour.

How do you keep getting one number off? (Tangent: Now I want the AU where Jon was in TAI and Tom was the tech, and how differently things would have gone from Jon getting kicked out of TAI onward). Also Tom would be the WORST manager omg.

My so-very-ME answer is Nicole is their biggest fan and occasional groupie but tbh IDK. I like the idea of DCriss being super into them and pushing to be able to do one of their songs on Glee because lol forever.

NOBODY HATES THEM how could you hate them. Maybe Ryan Rossy hates them after his epic messy breakup with Jon.

And um idk there was the time Tom booked them on three different flights because he couldn't manage to find one flight with five seats the day they needed to fly (going a day early occurred to him about a week after the whole debacle had passed) and then two got delayed so they had Jon & Looch where they were supposed to be but Sean & Max's flight canceled and Tom still in the air.

Tom Conrad and Ryan Ross have a long-standing bet. What's it about, what are the prizes, and most importantly, why is Kevin Jonas involved?

I feel like the only thing those two bet on would be Jon-related. UMMM idk they bet on whether Jon's secret love of the JoBros will come to light once he discovers he has a mutual acquaintance with Kevin.

Zack Hall is in love with someone on the list. Tell me how Zack Hall confesses their love.

BACK TO THE SCHOOLTEACHERS 'VERSE because that's how I roll and there should always be more Nicole/Zack.

So basically with them there was lots of innocent flirting across the hall (because obvs the first & second grade classrooms are across from each other) and across the soccer field (Nicole mostly started going to watch her students play) and then they ran into each other at a hardcore show and hook up because hot and sweaty and adrenaline-y and then more flirting and more hooking up and eventually dating.

I think Zack is the kind of dude who doesn't ever really say it, he just does stuff and she KNOWS. Like when they're talking about Nicole moving in with him and it turns out their dogs don't get along very well and instead of saying yeah no you can't bring Fendi if he's gonna upset Stella, he says they'll find a compromise. And the first time he let her sit on his shoulders at one of their hardcore shows even though he'd been telling her for months not to do that because he doesn't want to be responsible for her safety.

Nicole Anderson and Spencer Smith: What's their song and where do they dance to it at?

Their actual song is this little number, which they like to RickRoll each other with when Spencer's on tour or Nicole's on location and they're not together, and also randomly start singing at each other around the house.

The song they TELL people is theirs is the one he & Brendon wrote for Brendon to sing at their wedding, which is obvs where they danced to it at. It's very pretty and sweet and made for an A++ sappy first dance, but it lacks the charm of I Like Dogs.

Brendon Urie and Ian Crawford: Why do they hate each other?

Because Spencer only has one dick and sharing is hard.

Dallon Weekes and Darren Criss: Where was their first kiss, their last kiss, and their favorite kiss?

LET'S GO BACK TO THE HOGWARTS AU. Their first was on the lawn near the lake, where they were stretched out on a lazy day just after exams, casting charms to stir up the water and agitate the squid. Their last was in the Gryffindor common room at three in the morning, after a long talk that wasn't as hard as it should have been. Their favorite was in Darren's bed in his muggle parents' house, silencing charms on the room so they wouldn't hear what Dallon and Darren were up to.

Ryan Luciani and Max Steger: Go on an epic roadtrip. Give me 5 songs from Ryan Luciani's playlist and 5 songs from Max Steger's.

I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THEIR TASTE IN MUSIC. Um, 9 raw empires demos so they could talk while they drove about how to approach them in production, and Justin Bieber's "Baby" because Ryan is a horrible person and it is hilarious to watch Max pretend like it isn't stuck in his head.

Sean Van Vleet and Tom Conrad: Sean Van Vleet is Tom Conrad's sugardaddy. Uh. Tell me a story. :-D

Ahahahahaahahahaha. I just. AHAHAHAHAHA. UM idk. But can you imagine the epic fights when Sean decides he wants Tom to dress like he has a sugar daddy? Real clothes, Tom, and big boy shoes.

That was a lot of wasted money on Sean's part, wow.

Jon Walker, Ryan Ross, and Kevin Jonas: Are in a polyamorous relationship. How did it start? Is it a GOOD relationship? Does it last for very long? Any kids? Details!

I CAN'T EVEN. Kevin somehow stumbles into Jon & Ryan's horrible mess of an on-off tragic-awesome romance and it's fun for like a week and then horrifically messy and then he hightails it the fuck out of there and lets them go on being self-destructive and adorable in turns.

Z Berg and Zack Hall: Start out hating each other but slowly fall in love. What makes them stop hating each other?

All the awesome sex. It turns out it's even great when it isn't angry!

[livejournal.com profile] akire_yta asked:

Tell me about Jon Walker's twenty-first birthday party. who gave the best present, who was the uninvited guest, who danced the macarena at 3am?

Tom & Sean gave the best present: Tom blew Jon while Sean rimmed him and then they DP'd him. Max wasn't invited because he's a bb but he showed up anyway and probably kept them all from drinking themselves to death. And Looch macarena'd straight through from 2 am until he could no longer stand up.

Ryan Luciani is a Companion - to which Doctor, and who do they save?

Oh definitely Eleven. Luckily, when he stumbles into Eleven's adventure of the moment and got up to go traveling through space and time he was carrying his handy list of Sexiest Time Periods and kept trying to talk Eleven into letting him fuck someone in every period on the list. It's a little annoying when they keep coming upon catastrophes, usually catastrophes that take up so much time and cause so much chaos he isn't getting laid at ALL. I think they end up interfering in Jon's life in a few places and save him from himself and then there is Ryan/Jon.

Who does Spencer Smith like to spank?


But for real, Brendon & Nicole are his favorites. They have such perfect asses for it, and love it so much he can usually get them to do stuff for him while they argue over who gets to go first/longest/fucked after. The dogs get walked, the dishes get done, and then Spencer gets to spank the most perfect asses ever made. Life is good!

[livejournal.com profile] trcunning asked:

Why are Nicole Anderson & Tom Conrad bitter rivals?

Obviously because they are in a small town au and have entered a local dog show. Fendi vs Bear is the match of the century, beloved local dog vs beloved local dog.

Why'd Brendon Urie punch Ryan Ross? Did Z Berg kiss it better?

lol why DIDN'T Brendon punch Ryan, really. And she does, but also laughs at him, and maybe keeps prodding the bruise while she rides him to make him gasp and jerk around.

Who were Spencer Smith, Darren Criss and Kevin Jonas's first celebrities crushes?

Nick Carter.

What happened when Ian Crawford saw Dallon Weekes wearing Sean Van Vleet's clothes?

High fives! So many high fives. And then the sharing of the awesome story of how Dallon and Sean had incredibly tall sex.

[personal profile] la_dissonance asked:

If Dallon Weekes and Tom Conrad were to collaborate on a film project, what genre would it be?

I'm thinking weird comedy, the kind of humor where you have to be relatively smart/cultured to get the jokes but once you get them they're mostly stupid groaners. And there are lots of weird accents and an amazing soundtrack and at least three sex scenes because that's what you get when you ask Brendon & Looch to be your stars and tell them you value their creative input.

Talk about what went horribly wrong the last time Spencer Smith tried to order fast food.

He got a Filet O' Fish at McDonald's and Brendon spent the whole meal comparing tartar sauce to semen. When it turned out the sandwich had been bad and Spencer spends the whole next day suffering the consequences, Brendon really regrets that, because the next time Spencer sees come he gags. That one takes a while to get over.

Who has Sean Van Vleet secretly been crushing on for years?

His entire band and also probably Jon Walker.
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