(no subject)

[hector_rashbaum]

SCENE: {Pootling around the mall with Mom and Sister. Stop at the calendar kiosk. I find one calendar I like (SI Swimsuit Page-A-Day). Mom sees me looking at it. Put it back. Leaving the calendar kiosk:}

MOM: Didn't find anything you liked?

ME: Yeah, but I didn't think you'd want to buy me a swimsuit calendar.

MOM: No, but I will.

ME: [Gets the calendar and hands it to her]

MOM: Don't you want something inspirational, or funny, or - not a queer calendar?

ME: Nope.

{Pay. Leave the kisok.}

MOM: Will one of you carry the bag?

ME: The queer will.

MOM: [gives ME a look] You really shouldn't be joking about that

ME/SISTER: Um. You started it.

MOM: I figure when it's all said and done, you'll end up with a man, anyway. You're just taking what's available, right now. If Jon Bon Jovi showed up at you door, we would never have had this discussion. [Walks off]

ME: [stares after her, dumbfounded and totally insulted]

END SCENE.

Yeah. That's a wow on several levels.

*sigh*

At least Dad gets it.

Comments

[mayqueen517.livejournal.com]

You're just taking what's available, right now.

*noise* *another noise*

If Jon Bon Jovi showed up at you door, we would never have had this discussion.

Yes, but if JBJ showed up at your door and you drug him off to do naughty things, she'd probably call you a groupie or something.

I...wow.


Just. Fucking. Wow.

[madandy.livejournal.com]

Yes, but if JBJ showed up at your door and you drug him off to do naughty things, she'd probably call you a groupie or something.

First, it's dragged. Dragged. Not drug. (Sorry, pet hate.)

And second - you're absolutely right. Some daughters just seem to bring this response out in their mothers - nothing we do is good enough, or right enough. And considering that Hector's mother doesn't know you, I think she was bloody rude.

To you both, actually. She ought to be ashamed of herself, but she won't be. Women like that never are - because it's our fault that we don't fit their perfect ideal.

(Incidentally, my mother takes great delight in telling me I'm too old and fat to be a groupie. I'd love to bang a rockstar just to prove her wrong. And wouldn't it be lovely if it was a female rockstar? *Snort*)

[hector-rashbaum.livejournal.com]

To you both, actually. She ought to be ashamed of herself, but she won't be. Women like that never are - because it's our fault that we don't fit their perfect ideal.

It'd be silly to be ashamed for pointing out the truth - that this is just a phase, or a fluke, and the fact that I must have SOME level of commitment to be "spending a fortune" (her words) to travel to see her, to trust her enough to let her come visit me when it was MOM who raised me with that worry about letting "strangers" into your life through the internet means NOTHING.

The vindictive part of me instantly thought "that's it, I'm never dating a man again JUST TO SPITE YOU. So THERE."

Have fun with your lady rockstar :D

[hector-rashbaum.livejournal.com]

Hmph, I missed you getting online by like 20 minutes.

And you know you're not just a case of me "taking what's available", and I know that. If I was dating for dating's sake I wouldn't be putting up with the stupid goddamn distance. She said it herself when I was thinking of going to Asheville in February (still thinking of it by the way - this time it'll be a weekend, though, and I'll be better about letting you know everything in advance), "you spent a fortune on the last Carolina trip".

WOULD I BE SPENDING A FUCKING "FORTUNE" IF THIS WAS A CASE OF CONVENIENCE'S SAKE. NO.

Jesus, I just...ugh. I had to go pop into a toy store and wander around and try not to cry after that. Stupid fucking bitch. Just....aaaaargh.

And the thing is, she's gonna act hurt and insulted when I eventually stop coming home for chunks of time longer than a month. It's her own goddamn fault.

[madandy.livejournal.com]

Your mother and my mother should hang out. They'd love each other. My mum says 'oh well, you're married and you're too scared to actually leave, so you're not properly queer'.

*Hugs*

[stonefinder.livejournal.com]

I've been told by several friends and aquaintences that they've had more problems with finding acceptence from their mothers then their fathers when they came out of the closet. It surprised me, especially with the guys but they've all said the same thing. And of course, there is that connection with the mother we don't have with our fathers that makes it feel even worse. It was very passive aggressive of her, and clearly she's in denial, but it could be worse. I just hope she learns to cope and find peace with it for your sake, if not hers.

[hector-rashbaum.livejournal.com]

Part of me wants to say "maybe she doesn't know any better" than to say shit like 'queer' and 'dyke' (she throws around "queer" like it's an exact synonym for gay..."dyke" was just once, I wanted to wear a suit jacket over my dress to prom and she told me I'd look "dykey").

But she's a smart woman, and not an idiot politically, so she HAS to know what she's saying, and that kills me. And it's worse when I compare her to my father who's handling this wonderfully.

Maybe moms have that "I need my offspring to reproduce" thing stronger than dads, which is odd because in the world of fiction it's always the man who wants to continue his bloodline.

I...eh. I'm old enough now that she'll learn to at least be CIVIL about this or she won't see her oldest daughter anymore.

[stonefinder.livejournal.com]

Is it they need them to reproduce or, after having them inside their bodies, they have more difficulty separating from them? I don't know, except that what she is doing is very passive aggressive and you're right, it needs to stop.

[maxleedagger.livejournal.com]

Sheesh, that's pretty bad.

My mom just said, 'Please don't talk about it at work' - 'cause Russia IS a homo/biphobic country, so she just didn't want any potential trouble. But with her, it's like, 'whatever, just keep it safe' :)

[rdyfrde.livejournal.com]

Geez. Sometimes I wonder if all moms are screwed up in some sort of way. Though in my case, my mom would be pleased if I turned out gay because then her theory would be right. *rolls eyes*

[bella-cheval.livejournal.com]

What in the holy fuck is going on up there? I mean, sheesh...

[ashestothestars.livejournal.com]

Seriously... What the fuck?

For a minute I thought I was reading something involving my mother. I don't know what the heck it is with some mothers, if I did I'd explain why that happened. Honestly it leaves me without words, staring at the screen going "guh?"

[silicondreams.livejournal.com]

Agagagagaga ok that's fucking stupid. What the fuck? Taking what's available?! Jesus. I didn't know "available" meant "in a completely different state and by the way, a woman too which doesn't make it easier for the world at large" - seriously. If you were "taking what's available" you'd be dating, I dunno, the toilet nazi next door. Damn!

Ok, that's it, you're welcome to share my mother, she of the "you should find yourself a girlfriend..."

(And seriously, what the hell of an argument is that? APART from the fact you're in a relationship so saying something like that is tasteless and insulting - she really thinks that if a female hot rocker showed up your reaction would be different? Geez.)

[zek-chan.livejournal.com]

Wow. Just...wow.

I'm having trouble wrapping my head around that. It just amazes me that she could say something like that, and not just accept you for who you are.

I can't even form a cognitive thought at that.

[bonjovis.livejournal.com]

I can't even believe this. Aren't mothers suppose to love their children no matter what and the father have the stick up the ass. I think your parents have their roles swtiched. but srsly wow i can't understand this. im so sorry, i don't know what i'd do if my mother hated me.